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The Martha's Vineyard Museum
 Having
a child die is every parent's worst nightmare. When that happens
there is a darkness that descends, a shadow that can blanket an
entire person or family. In that sorrow there is a need to remember,
celebrate, honor, talk about and share the life of that child.
There is also a need to try and heal, to find a place to keep
the grief that is always with you.
The Martha's Vineyard Historical Society, as steward
for the Edgartown lighthouse, and as part of their restoration
of the historic lighthouse, has created the Children's Memorial
at the Edgartown Lighthouse to memorialize children who have died.
It is for children only, and we believe, it is the only one of
its kind. It is for children of all ages everywhere, not just
children from the island. People from all over have embraced the
Memorial and aided in its development.
Lighthouses have always been symbols of safety,
warning us away from danger and lighting our way back to safety
and home. The Edgartown lighthouse is a working lighthouse, illuminating
the darkness every night. It seems so very appropriate to keep
our children in its light and have the memory of their lives and
love shine forth with that beacon, guiding us all in our search
for safety, healing and peace.
 The
badly deteriorated base of the lighthouse was rebuilt and families
can have their child's name carved into a granite cobblestone
and placed permanently into the foundation. The blocks are laid
parallel to the shoreline in a pattern echoing the rhythm of the
waves, marked by compass points. It is our hope that the child's
name will be seen in the context of eternity.
The Memorial is made of 3500 granite cobblestones,
2000 of them of a size to hold a child's name. They are surrounded
by a polished granite border and divided into quadrants by granite
spokes mirroring beams of light from above. Please visit the design
section to know more.
This gives us a place where the joy and love of
children can be celebrated, a place to keep the love and memories
alive. A parent mourns the passing of their child every day, but
it is their life, spirit and love we remember and cherish and
wish to honor..
The vision and creation of the Memorial is the outgrowth
of a family's tragedy and one parent's efforts to come to terms
with his grief. In October of 1995, Rick Harrington's son, Ricky,
was killed in a car accident. "When you have a child die,
there's no way you can get over it and get on with your life.
It's impossible, it can't be done. But you learn to find ways
to live around that tragedy."
Rick grew up on Martha's Vineyard and his boys spent
their summers on the island, swimming, playing, and fishing for
hours at a time. After Ricky died, Rick started seeing images
of lighthouses everywhere, on a woman's clothing in church one
day, on a billboard, and in a dream at night.
He came across a photograph of Ricky and his younger
brother standing in front of the lighthouse, and took the words
on Ricky's T shirt, "Just Do It" literally. In that
moment the dream of a joyful and fitting memorial for his son
began to take place.
After years of hard work and fundraising, the Memorial
became a reality in July 2001 and presently has almost 400 children
in it. There are children here of all ages who have died from
illness, accidents and other tragedies. Some are from the Vineyard,
many are from further away. Together they are holding vigil at
the lighthouse, sending out a beacon of light, love, support and
memories that cannot help but touch us, guide us, hold us, comfort
and enrich our souls.
The road to healing is a long one, and different
for each person. We hope the Memorial can be a way station for
you on that pilgrimage or journey.
For those of you who have visited the memorial or
have children who are part of it, I hope this site can help maintain
that connection. For those of you that cannot visit the Memorial,
I hope the web site can bring you a sense of its quiet wonder
and simple grace. Martha's Vineyard is a place of great beauty
and of kindness. The beauty I hope you might experience a little
in the pictures of Edgartown and the island. The kindness you
will have to experience personally. Those of you who might travel
here will find some information about the island and links to
other, more thorough sites on our travel
resources page.
There is also a grief resource section with links
to information, support groups, chat rooms and web sites people
have created to honor their children and help others with their
grief.
For those of you who were drawn by an interest in
lighthouses, we have some more lighthouse links and history of
our lighthouse.
For whatever reason you visited our site, we hope
you will leave with your hearts a little fuller and the knowledge
that you take our best wishes with you.
top of
page
the memorial, design,
adding a child
history, resources,
contact,
home
the names of the children who are at the memorial
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